Refuge House Resources - Safety Planning.

Isolate you from people you care about most or from friends that you had before you entered the relationship?
Frequently embarrass or make fun of you in front of other people?
Use intimidation to make you do what he wants?
Make you feel that there is “no way out” of the relationship?
Make you perform sexual acts that you don't enjoy
Threaten you with words, force or weapons?
Use alcohol or drugs as an excuse for saying hurtful things or abusing you?
Get extremely angry frequently and you don't understand why?
Not believe he has hurt you or blame you for what he has done
Physically force you to do something against your will?

Having a plan will best ensure that you can leave safely with your children, valued possessions and family pets on your own terms. Every step of your plan reduces risk; safety planning removes surprises and continues on through your stay in a shelter. Here are some guidelines to adhere to while designing your personal safety plan.

Know how to get away (best route to take, method of transport)
Know where to go for shelter services and help
Know how to stay in contact with helpers
Know what to do for children's safety
Know how to stay safe while at work and play
Know what to do with family pets—there are people who can help
Know what must be taken if leaving quickly
Know what each member of the family should do to leave safely
Know what to do if confronted by an abuser (e.g. in court or in home)
Know that it may be necessary to change services (bank, doctor, etc.)
Know that help is available
Know that it is safer to travel with a third person
Know that it may not be best to take children to any meeting with an abuser
Know that the abuser's main object is to get partner to return